Promises
by RedYellow11
Summary: Jennifer Jareau never broke a promise. Usually, I found that a remarkable aspect of her character, but right at that moment, it was the part of her that I hated the most. JJ/Emily. Now, rated M.
1. Losing JJ

A/N: Okay, over the past few weeks, I have become obsessed with this paring, so I thought I'd try writing something for them. This chapter is on the short side, but it's just sort of an introduction to what's going on. Please R&R.

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"Don't do this. Please, don't do this to me."

It took everything in me to hold the tears back. I knew this day would come eventually, and I'd tried to prepare myself, but there was no preparing myself for this. JJ was here, at my apartment telling me that it was over.

"This has to end, Emily. I can't keep doing this to him."

Him. Will LaMontagne. I hated him. He had the one thing I wanted more than anything else...he had JJ. How that mumbling excuse for a man had convinced JJ she wanted to be with him was beyond me, but he had. JJ kept talking. "I've already hurt him enough."

"What about me?" I asked. "What about how much this is tearing me apart?"

JJ looked at the ground. "You aren't making this easy for me, Em."

I was shocked. "Oh, I'm sorry that I'm making this difficult for you. I guess I should be more accommodating while you rip my heart out!"

"I didn't mean for any of this to happen. I'm sorry."

"Don't. Don't say you're sorry."

"But I am. I never meant for us to go this far."

"That's what you're sorry about?" I asked angrily. "You're sorry that we got this far? So, you're not sorry that you've played me? You're not sorry that you made me believe that you loved me? You're just sorry that you didn't stop this before we started fucking?!"

JJ flinched, and I immediately wanted to apologize for yelling at her, but I was too angry. I was waging war within myself. Half of me wanted to console her and tell her I understood. Half of me just wanted to throw her out for everything she had put me through. I was fighting so hard to let my latter half win.

"That's not what I meant, Em, I just-"

"Stop doing that!" I yelled.

"Doing what?"

"Stop calling me Em!" I could feel the tears start to form in my eyes, so I turned away from her. ""You don't get to call me that anymore." I was starting to sound like a pouty little kid.

"Emily, I didn't mean to hurt you, but I can't hurt Will. He's given up everything for me. He gave up his job and his home."

"That doesn't mean you have to give everything up for him. It's not fair to you, JJ." I heard her step closer to me, and I turned around to face her. "Just tell me one thing."

"Okay," JJ said.

"Do you love him?" I asked. "Does he really make you happy? Do you spend all day thinking about him?"

She looked at the ground. "He's been good to me."

"That's not what I asked, JJ."

She looked at the ground, and I knew I had my answer.

"That doesn't change anything, Emily," she said. "I promised him I'd be with him."

"You don't have to give your life to him just because you promised. Things were different when you first met him. You didn't know how I felt."

"Exactly, Emily." JJ's eyes shot up to my face. I couldn't quite read the expression on her face, but it looked a lot like anger. "You didn't tell me how you felt until it was too late. I was already with Will. You had plenty of time to tell me, but you didn't."

"Wait a minute," I cut in. "Are you seriously blaming this on me right now?" No, that couldn't be it. This wasn't my fault. This wasn't anybody's fault. You love who you love.

"Well, it's not my fault that you didn't tell me before! Face it, you wouldn't have said anything if it weren't for Will coming into my life!"

"I was afraid you'd hate me!" I yelled back at her. "I was terrified of losing you!"

"So why did you tell me at all?"

"Because I felt you pull away as soon as the two of you got together. I figured I was either going to tell you and lose you because you thought I was sick or something, or I would lose you to him."

JJ got quiet. "You weren't losing me to him," she finally said.

"Really? Before you two got together, we used to be together all the time. Even when you were in other relationships, you'd make time for me. Then, Will comes along, and it's like I don't exist." I took a deep breath. "I know he doesn't like me. I figure that he's been telling you not to talk to me anymore, and that's sad. The real JJ wouldn't let some guy tell her who and who not to talk to. That's not who you really are."

"You have no idea who I am," she said, snapping at me. "Just because we fucked doesn't mean that you know me."

I saw her put her hand over her mouth. I knew she didn't mean it, and I knew that she regretted saying it as soon as it came out of her mouth, but it hurt me all the same.

"Wow, that's stooping to a new low," I said.

"I didn't mean that, Emily. I'm so sorry."

"I don't really care if you're sorry, Jennifer." I looked her straight in the eye and gave her the most pissed off face I could muster. I'd rather her see me pissed off than hurting.

"You don't get to call me that anymore," she said, turning her defenses back on.

"What?" I asked, confused.

"If I can't call you Em, then you can't call me Jennifer."

I shook my head. "Okay, I'm glad we've both handled this situation with maturity and grace. I think this conversation is over. You can leave now."

"Wait," she said. "I didn't mean for this conversation to go this way. I just wanted to say that I'm sorry for everything. I'm sorry I'm doing this to you. I didn't play you. I meant every word that I ever said to you, but this isn't right."

"No, this is right. The only thing that's wrong is letting Will get in between us."

"But that's just the thing, Emily. Will didn't get between us. Will and I got together first. He moved out here and made me the focus of his life before you and I ever did anything." She took a step closer to me. "I can't leave him, Emily. I just can't."

I looked into her eyes, and I knew the truth. I knew she loved me and that she wanted more than anything to be with me. I knew she hadn't just strung me along to get rid of some sexual frustration. She hadn't lied when she'd said she meant everything she'd told me. I could also see that she wasn't going to leave Will. Jennifer Jareau never broke a promise. Usually, I found that a remarkable aspect of her character, but right at that moment, it was the part of her that I hated the most.

I took in a deep breath and continued to hold back the tears I knew so desperately wanted to escape from my eyes. "I don't want us to be cold and distant."

"I don't want that either. I want us to be friends like we were before."

"We can never be friends like we were before," I said. I saw JJ's face drop. "But we can still be friends."

Her face brightened a little. "Really?"

No. "Yeah, I think we could be."

JJ pulled me into a hug, and I felt one tear roll down my cheek. I quickly wiped it away as she pulled away from me before she could notice it was there.

"You are the most amazing person I've ever met, Emily Prentiss."

I chuckled humorlessly. "Thanks, I guess."

"I'm gonna go. Will's probably waiting for me at the house." I looked away from her. I wasn't going to cry. I couldn't cry in front of her. I heard her smack herself on the forehead. "Wow, I'm really a fucking idiot. Sometimes I should just not open my big fat mouth."

I laughed sadly. "Yeah. How you stand in front of a crowd of reporters and speak so well is beyond me."

She smiled. "I'm gonna go now, okay?" I just nodded in reply. "Goodnight, Em," she said, placing a kiss on my cheek. I so badly wanted to pull her into a hug and never let go. I wanted to kiss her and convince her that I was the one for her, but I knew it would work. JJ didn't break promises. She walked out of my apartment, taking my heart with her.

"Goodbye, Jennifer." As soon as I knew she was gone, I let the tears fall.


	2. The Beginning

I knew the moment I met Jennifer Jareau that I would fall in love with her. She was smart and classy without coming off like a snob. She actually got my dry sense of humor...something that very few people were able to understand. She was dedicated to her job, but she hadn't let it consume her. She was still a loving, caring human being. Add the fact that she was the most gorgeous woman I'd ever laid eyes on, and she was perfect.

Well, almost perfect.

JJ and I were friends immediately. She had this way of making me feel like I was a part of the team when I felt like everyone else hated me. If it weren't for her (and later Derek), I probably wouldn't have made it as long in the BAU as I have. We started spending almost all of our time together. Even when she was dating the lunkhead of the week, she'd find time for me. She kept saying there was nothing that could keep her away from her Emily time.

If we were in hotels working on a case, she'd come to my room and talk to me. We'd just talk about anything and everything: the case, relationships (well, her relationships), family...seriously, anything that popped into our heads, we could say to each other. The only thing that I couldn't tell her was that I was slowly but surely falling in love with her. Besides that, we kept nothing from each other.

That is, until, Will came into the picture.

That damn case in New Orleans. I think about it almost every day. I feel like that was the moment I lost JJ. Well, not at first. I knew she was dating him after the case, but I didn't say anything. I'd hoped that she would tell me herself. I was supposedly her best friend after all, but she never said anything. It really bothered me that she was keeping such a big secret from me, but every time I'd start to get mad, I'd remind myself that I'd kept my love for her a secret, and that was just as big...if not bigger.

I knew she was straight, and I didn't want to lose her, so I started to pull away...just a little bit. We'd always been really affectionate around each other. We'd hold each other's hands through hard times, or give one another reassuring hugs that I let last just a little bit longer than normal. After I totally fell for her, though, I stopped doing that. Sure, we'd hug, but it wasn't quite the same. I had to pull back to keep my feelings in check. JJ was straight, and nothing was going to change that.

When we saw Will again, he was practically drooling over JJ. Sure, I'd known that they were together, but he looked like a love-stricken puppy. I shouldn't judge. I'm sure I looked the same way around her, but I couldn't help but hate him. Still, I didn't want to interfere with JJ's happiness, so I pushed them together. Why I thought that was a good idea, I'll never know. She looked at me for a split second before she ran out after him and I could've sworn I saw something in her eyes...something telling me to stop her from what she was about to do. I shrugged the feeling off as soon as I saw them kiss. It was probably wishful thinking on my part.

That's really when I lost JJ. We barely spent any time outside of work together. Hugs had stopped completely. She never called unless it was for work. I'd get excited every time I head my phone ring, only to be disappointed when it was my mom to nag at me or Derek trying to convince me to be his wing man. Things were getting really pathetic.

Finally, I couldn't take it anymore. I couldn't take the silence between us, and I couldn't take holding my feelings in. I had to tell her. If that ended our friendship, so be it. As I figured it, it couldn't last much longer in this shape anyway. I drove to her house, knowing Will was in New Orleans, to tell her how I felt. I knocked on the door, and I could tell she was surprised when she saw me standing there.

"_Emily? What're you doing here?" she asked._

_Seeing her there, actually standing in front of me, I started to lose my nerve. "Um...I'm sorry, I just wanted to talk to you, but if this is a bad time-"_

"_No!" she cut me off. "Don't go. I'm glad to see you." She looked me in the eye, and I could tell there was something on her mind. I couldn't put my finger on it, but there was something there. "Do you wanna come in? I can make coffee."_

"_No, that's okay," I said. "I mean, yeah, I'd like to come in, but you don't have to make anything. I'll be okay." I stepped inside._

"_Um, okay. Just make yourself comfortable," she said. I wanted to pace around the room. Pacing always made me feel better, but I knew I'd look crazy, so I sat on the couch. She sat next to me. I immediately felt how close she was, and I scooted away a little bit. I looked up and saw a hurt look on JJ's face._

"_Hey," I said, scooting closer again. "Sorry, I just...I just haven't had anyone in my bubble for a while." I forced a laugh._

_She looked at the ground. "Em, I don't want you to think I'm not happy to see you. I really am happy, but what's this about? You don't usually just stop by like this."_

"_I used to..." I mumbled under my breath. Unfortunately, she heard me._

"_Yeah, I know, but you haven't for a while, so what's up?"_

_I started to panic. I didn't know what to say. "I...um...we...well...what happened to us, Jay?"_

_She looked at the ground, at back at me. "What do you mean?"_

_I raised my eyebrows. "Are you serious? We used to be practically attached at the hip, and now we barely talk. The last time you called me off hours was a month ago, and that was to ask me about paperwork."_

"_I just haven't had that much time on my hands, you know? I mean, with Will and everything."_

"_Yeah, I know, but it's not like you have to spend every second of every day with him. We could still have time for us."_

"_Emily, we see each other every day. I like spending time with people outside of work. Will gives me that. And he loves me."_

_Something struck me as off when she said that. "He loves you?" I asked._

"_Yeah. In fact, he's transferring out here to live with me."_

_Something was DEFINITELY wrong with the way she said that. Was she sad? Did she want him to stay in New Orleans?_

"_JJ...do you love him?" I asked._

"_I...I care for him a lot. He's everything I've always wanted. He's loving, and loyal, and he'll do almost anything to make me happy."_

"_Okay, those are all good things...but do you love him?"_

_She looked at the ground. "I...I want to."_

_I wanted to dance for joy and cry for her at the same time. "Why? There are plenty of other people out there. I'm sure there's someone else out there. Someone you could actually love."_

_I saw a tear roll down JJ's cheek, and I wanted so badly to wipe it away, but I didn't want to be too forward. "He's...I don't know...easy? He's stable, and reliable, and I know he won't break my heart. I just...I don't love him, but I have to try. Maybe, in time, I'll grow to love him."_

"_You can't force yourself to love him, JJ."_

"_I know, but-" she stopped. "About six months after we started dating,he told me that I was the one for him, and I, being my stupid self, promised that I would never leave him. I know that sounds stupid, but I just can't break that promise. If I did, it would destroy his whole world. I can't break his heart. It would hurt him too much."_

"_JJ, you're too kind for your own good sometimes."_

_She smiled at me and wiped the tears from her face. "Besides, no one else is going to love me like that."_

_That was the part of JJ that I never quite understood. On the surface, she was this uber-confident, blonde-haired, blue-eyed bombshell. On the inside, though, all she saw was a person unworthy of all the attention she got from guys...unworthy of affection and deep friendships...unworthy of love._

_I couldn't let her think that anymore._

"_Someone else does love you like that. In fact, I'd be willing to wager this person loves you more than he possibly could." Yeah, I didn't think much of Will or his love._

_JJ just laughed a little bit and hugged me. "It's really sweet what you're trying to do, but unless you can tell me who, I ain't buying it."_

_I took a deep breath. It was now or never._

"_It's me, JJ."_

_JJ pulled back and looked me in the eyes. "What?_

"_It's me. I...I'm in love with you. I have been for a long time." I leaned in and gave her a quick but soft kiss. God, I wanted it to go on so much longer than that, but I didn't want to force myself on her. "Please don't hate me."_

_JJ just sat there looking shocked. I could tell she wanted to say something, but the words weren't coming, so I took this as my cue to leave. I stood up, but I felt her grab my wrist and pull me back onto the couch. Before I could react, she was kissing me. It only took me a split second to respond. Her lips were amazing. I couldn't believe that this was really happening. She was really kissing me. Was I dreaming? _

_It wasn't long before I felt her tongue run along my bottom lip, and I opened my mouth to let her in. Our mouths fit together so perfectly. They moved together in sync like we'd been doing this for years. We spent the rest of the night discovering each other. I felt JJ's body under mine, writhing in pleasure as she called out my name for the first time that night, and I knew the feeling would become an addiction..._

And now here I was...a year later, sitting in my apartment, crying so hard I could barely breathe. I was shaking by she time I'd cried all the tears out of my body. I just sat on the floor, holding myself and shaking back and forth for God knows how long. It took my cell phone ringing to knock me somewhat back to my senses. I got up and flipped it open.

"Prentiss," I managed to get out.

"Hey," came the voice on the other side. "Are you alright? You haven't been answering your phone all night."

It was Morgan. He'd become my confidante after JJ and I had stopped talking. He'd become even more important after JJ and I got involved with each other.

"Em, is something up?" he asked after getting no response. "Should I be seriously worried?"

"She..." I couldn't quite say the words. I didn't want to cry anymore, but I could feel the tears coming.

"She? She who? What's going on?" I didn't say anything, but Morgan seemed to catch on. "Wait...is this about JJ?"

That did it, I started to cry again.

"She said that she couldn't do this anymore. It isn't fair to Will," I said between sobs.

"You hold on right there, Prentiss. I'll be right over."

"You don't have to do that Morgan," I said. "I'll be fine."

"No arguing. I'll be over soon. You just sit tight."

He hung up the phone. I knew it wouldn't be long. When Derek Morgan had somewhere to be in a hurry, he'd move heaven and earth to get there. It was only about a half an hour before I heard a knock on the door. I opened it, and was immediately engulfed in a hug.

"I'm sorry it took me so long," he said. "I was out with Garcia, and I had to drop her off at Kevin's on the way here."

"It's okay. I'm just glad to see you."

I told him everything that had happened that night. I just let all of my pent up emotions spill out, and he just sat there and listened. When I was finally done, he spoke up.

"Wow. That's...wow. I don't know what to say to that. I'm so sorry, Em." We were sitting on my couch by now, and he was trying to hold me and calm me down, but it wasn't really working. I'd at least stopped crying.

"I just can't believe it's over," I said. I looked him in the eye. "I know it's stupid, but a part of me always thought she'd choose me in the end. My head kept telling me that I should be realistic and know she would stay with him, but I couldn't shake it. I really thought we'd end up happy together."

"I know, sweetie. I know, but maybe this is a good thing. This has been tearing you up inside. Maybe you can finally move on."

"I don't wanna move on. Morgan. She's the only person I ever see myself feeling this way about. She's my everything."

"I know you're hurting. Hell, I would be too if I were you, but you have to believe that you'll move on. You have to, or this is going to rip you apart."

"I know," I said. I sat there, leaning against Morgan for a while longer, but eventually, I felt how tired I was. "I'm gonna try to sleep."

"You know, I can stay here, if you want," he said.

"No, it's okay. You've done enough. I don't think I'll ever be able to repay you for coming here like this."

"Don't mention it," he said, giving me one more hug. "You call me any time, and I'll be here faster than you can blink."

"Thanks, Morgan."

"Anytime," he said, walking out the door. I crawled into bed, not caring that I was still fully dressed. It didn't take long for me to drift off to sleep.

That night, I dreamed of nothing but JJ. The way she kissed me, the way she made me feel, and the way she left me that night.


	3. The Proposal

I woke up the next morning, and I could feel the effects of the night before. My head was throbbing, my eyes were swollen, and my stomach was churning. The after effects of breaking up with JJ was a lot like having a hangover, but about a million times worse. Plus, hangovers didn't usually carry the extra sting of a broken heart.

I didn't want to go to work that day. I really just wanted to call off sick of something, but I know that wouldn't fly, and if we got a new case, I'd get called in anyway. Still, I didn't want to have to face her...not after what had happened the night before.

I dragged myself out of bed and got ready for work. I took my time, because if I was late to work, I figured JJ would already be in her office looking over case files. When I got in, I was pleased (and sad) that I was right. I just hoped that the team wouldn't talk to me today. I knew Derek would try to make small talk to lighten my mood a little bit, but I could handle that. Reid didn't usually talk to me one-on-one, so no worries there. If Hotch or Rossi talked to me, I knew it would be about work. Again, I could handle that. In fact, I wouldn't mind if they had some assignment they needed me to go off on for a while.

There were only two people I was really worried about. Obviously, I didn't want to talk to JJ. She'd just try to apologize or make amends, and I really wasn't ready for that yet. Then, there was Garcia. The woman could read almost anyone like a book. She may have not been a profiler, but she might as well have been. I didn't want her to read me today. Not after what happened. Having Morgan know about everything was enough. If Penelope knew, too, I didn't think I could deal with it.

I sat at my desk trying to hide from the world, when Derek came over to me.

"Hey," he said, putting his hand on my shoulder. "How're you holding up?"

"I'm better than I thought I would be, actually." That was a lie, but I wasn't about to break down in front of him again, especially not at work. I knew he knew I was full of it, but he let it slide.

"That's good. Just know I'm here if you need to talk."

"Need to talk about what?" I heard a voice say behind Morgan. It was Penelope.

"Hey, Garcia," I said. "How was your weekend?"

"Oh, same old, same old. Got to see a lot of my two favorite boys," she said, winking at Morgan. Garcia was lucky that Kevin was so trusting. "Last night got cut short, though. Derek said it had something to do with you, so spill."

"Um...I think I'm gonna go get some coffee," Morgan said. He left without another word. I could've killed him.

Garcia looked after his retreating form, then at me. "Okay, what's going on with you two? You're being all secretive."

"Nothing. He's just helping me through some stuff, that's all." I REALLY didn't want to have this conversation/

"Okay, what kind of stuff. You know I have to know everything. I can't be the all-knowing goddess if you all start keeping secrets behind my back."

"Garcia, it's not a big deal-"

"Oh my god," she cut me off and leaned in closer to me. "Are you two...involved?"

"No!" I said a lot louder than I meant to. "God no! Not to say he's not attractive or anything."

"Yeah, you'd have to be blind and deaf to think he was anything but delicious." I gave Garcia a smile. She did have a knack for brightening up my day. "Besides, I know you play for the other team. That's really the only reason I'd be shocked if you two got together."

My eyes got wide. "What did you just say?"

"Seriously, Emily, did you think it was a secret? You're not exactly the femmest lady I've ever met." I glared at her, and she threw her arms up in defense. "Not to say you're butch or anything! I just mean...well, you always pinged my gaydar. And my gaydar is never wrong." She smiled at me.

"You really do know everything, don't you?" I asked her.

"I try," she said before remembering why she had started talking to me in the first place. "Although, I don't know what's going on with you, so I must be told."

I was about to reply with yet another avoidance of the discussion when I saw JJ walk out of her office and up to me.

"Hey, Emily," she said.

"Hello, Agent Jareau." I knew it was overly formal, but I couldn't bring myself to be casual around the woman who had turned my world upside-down. I knew it hurt her, so I loosened up a little bit. "How are you?"

"I'm okay, just tired. I didn't sleep very well last night."

Garcia smiled at her. "What, did Will keep you up all night?" she asked suggestively.

I felt like I was going to vomit. I didn't even hear the rest of the conversation that the two of them had. I knew that JJ was looking at me, trying to read my face, but I'd thrown up my walls, and I was determined to not let her break them down again. I felt her walk away, and I relaxed some...but not much.

"Okay," Garcia said, bringing me back to my senses. "What the hell was that?"

"Huh?" I asked.

"You went totally non-responsive on us, Em."

"Oh, sorry, I just kind of got lost in thought. There's a lot going on in my head." That wasn't totally a lie...but it was pretty far from the truth.

It was like a light bulb went off in Garcia's head. "Wait a minute...is there something going on between you and JJ?"

I looked at the ground and shook my head. "No, there isn't."

"Don't lie to me, Emily. I'm not blind. Are you two a couple?"

"No! We're not a couple, so just butt out, okay?" Garcia was a little taken aback, and I immediately felt guilty. "I'm sorry, Penelope. I didn't mean to go off on you like that."

"Hey, no worries. I guess I did push you a little too hard. I'll just leave you alone." She turned around and started to walk away.

"Pen, wait," I said. I took a deep breath. "There is something going on between me and JJ. At least, there was until last night."

Garcia looked at me, disbelief written all over her face. "Are you serious?" I nodded. "I can't believe this. JJ is my best friend. How could I have not seen this going on?"

"We were really quiet about it. I think only Derek knows."

"Derek knows and he didn't tell me?! Oh that sneaky son of a-"

"It's not his fault," I said. "He wanted to tell you, but I swore him to secrecy."

There was a silence between us as Garcia processed her new information.

"So how ling has this been going on?" she finally asked.

"About a year," I replied.

"A year? That long?" I nodded. "But it ended last night?"

"Yeah. She broke it off."

Garcia sighed. "How serious were the two of you? I mean, she's still with Will, right?"

Ugh, I hated even hearing that stupid name. "Yeah, she's still with him. That's why she left, actually. She said she couldn't hurt him anymore."

"Did he know she was cheating?" she asked.

"God no. He would've killed me by now. At least, he would've tried." Garcia smiled at me, and I kept talking. "We were...it's hard to say how serious we were. I love her, and she said she loved me...but obviously not enough to leave him..." I trailed off, and Garcia pulled me into a hug.

"Sweetie, it's okay. You'll be okay. I just can't believe this all happened."

"Neither can I," I replied.

"Well, if you need anyone to talk to, you know I'm here, right?"

I smiled at her. "Yeah, I knew you'd say something like that."

"Okay, I have to go and do some research for JJ. Are you gonna be alright?" she asked. I nodded, and she headed off to her office.

Talking to Garcia had actually surprisingly made me feel a little bit better about everything...that is until I saw JJ walking up to my desk again.

"Hey, can I see you in my office for a second?" she asked me. I wanted to say no and tell her to go to hell, but I figured that would look pretty weird to everyone around us, so I just followed her to her office. She closed the door behind us and turned to me. "What were you talking about with Penelope?"

"I really don't think it's any of your business, Jareau." I was proud of myself for sounding so confident.

"I...I didn't mean anything by it. I just wanted to know." She sat down at her desk. "I don't like the thought of you saying bad things about me, even if I do deserve it."

I shook my head. "I didn't say anything bad about you. We just talked. She was just trying to know what was going on." I tried to lighten the mood. "You know how Garcia is about gossip. She must know everything."

JJ laughed a little bit. "True." We dropped into an awkward silence that I didn't know how to break. She sighed. "You know, I really am sorry about everything...and I really did mean it when I said I wanted us to be friends."

I nodded. "I know."

"Okay," she said, "so why have you been avoiding me all morning?"

"It's not like I can just get over this in one night. In time, maybe, we can be friends, but right now...right now, I don't know."

We fell into the world's most awkward silence. She just looked at me, and I looked just about anywhere else.

"You hate me."

I wasn't even sure she'd said it. It had barely been above a whisper, but by the look on her face, I could tell she had.

"I don't hate you, Jen-" I started, but then corrected myself, "JJ. I could never hate you. I'm just going to have to let go, that's all. It's going to take some time, but-"

"What if I don't want you to let go?"

I knew I'd heard her right that time, I just couldn't believe it.

"What's that supposed to mean?" I asked.

"I...I love you. You know that, and I'm having a hard time seeing what the right decision in this situation is." I saw a tear go down her cheek, and I so desperately wanted to wipe it away, but I held back and listened to her talk. "Everything in me wants you, Emily. My heart is screaming at me to tell you to take me back, but my head is telling me that I'm with Will and I owe him something. Not to mention the fact that my parents would disown me if they ever found out about you. I mean, they love Will..."

"But you don't," I said. "You shouldn't do this for them."

"But I feel like I owe them something, too. They've done so much for me."

"Don't you feel like you owe yourself some happiness from time to time?" I asked her. I knew the answer. JJ never did anything for her self unless it went along with what everyone else wanted, too.

JJ looked down at her desk. "I want you so badly Emily, it's just-"

Her cell phone ringing cut her off, and she picked it up with an annoyed look on her face.

"Jareau...oh hey." I knew who it was from the fake enthusiasm in her voice. Once again, Will LaMontagne had gotten in the way. She kept talking. "I'm fine...everything's okay." Pause. "No, I haven't been crying, I'm just a little stressed, that's all." Pause. "What am I doing for lunch?" She looked up at me, asking me with her eyes if it was okay to go with him. I nodded, and she seemed disappointed. "Nothing, we can eat at the diner around the corner from the office. See you then." With that, she hung up the phone.

I looked at her, and I could tell that she'd wanted me to object to her going out with Will.

"You know," I said, "sometimes, I wish you could just come out and say what you really want to say. I'm sick of trying to figure you out, JJ." I stormed out of the office, not giving her a chance to try to get me to stay. I knew if she got that chance, I'd stay, and we'd keep talking in circles. It was starting to give me a headache.

Will walked in not too long after I'd let JJ's office. I wanted to punch him, or at the very least, glare at him so he knew how very unwelcome he was in my eyes, but I didn't. I just stared at my desk, and tried to concentrate on my paperwork.

Before the happy couple went out to lunch, however, Will stopped them in the middle of the bullpen.

"Okay everybody," he said. "I hope I'm not bothering you all, but I have a something that I want to do. Something that can't wait." He turned to JJ, who had an annoyed expression that made me inwardly smile. "Baby, we've been together for quite a while now, and I think this has waited for long enough."

I couldn't believe what was unfolding in front of my eyes as the bumbling idiot got down on one knee.

"Now, JJ," he said, "I already talked to your parents, and they've given us their blessing." He pulled a small, velvet box out of his jacket pocket. "Will you marry me?


	4. Great

It's funny how time seems to stop in those big moments in your life. It seems that no one moves or reacts for the longest time, when in reality, it's probably only a few seconds...if that. However, there are those occasions that everyone is so shocked that there is no response, no movement for an amount of time that is much longer than it should be. It's like everyone is holding their breath, waiting for someone to make the first move.

In this case, everyone was waiting for JJ, and she wasn't making it.

It was almost entertaining to see everyone's reaction to Will's proposal. Hotch looked stoic and Rossi looked bored, but that was nothing new. Reid looked like a kicked puppy. Will and I weren't the only ones to fall for the press liaison. Sure, Reid had figured out that he didn't have a chance with JJ, but a part of him would never accept that.

Garcia and Morgan were both looking between JJ and me. Garcia had a look of shock on her face. It was a lot to find out that your best friends were sleeping together, but for it to happen the exact same day as this proposal...I was pretty sure her head was going to explode. Morgan looked livid. He hated Will almost as much as I did. Morgan kind of thought of himself as JJ's big brother; he needed to protect her and look out for her. In his eyes, the Louisiana detective wasn't near good enough for his baby sister. That's why he'd been so thrilled when JJ and I started things up. He thought, just like I did, that she would eventually leave him for me. I still didn't know if he was right or not.

Will had this stupid grin on his face. He was so sure that JJ was going to accept. Why shouldn't he believe that? She'd never turned him down before. He'd bought this huge, tacky ring that probably cost a fortune, but I knew JJ would hate it. JJ had told me (and I'm sure Will) a thousand times that she hated huge diamonds. She didn't like drawing attention to herself, and that's what huge rings did. All she wanted was a simple silver band, and he'd gone out and bought this ridiculously hideous ring. Just showed yet again that he didn't listen to half of the things that came out of JJ's mouth.

JJ was the one that worried me, though. Since the moment I'd met JJ, I'd always been able to read her. It wasn't like I was profiling her or anything. I respected her enough not to do that, and besides, we had unwritten rules about that in the bureau, but I could just read her like a book without really trying. Of course, there were the times that she surprised me. Her kissing me that first time had completely thrown me, but that was mostly because I kept ignoring all the signs in fear that I was imagining them. Besides that, there really wasn't much else that she'd been able to keep from me.

Right then, though, I couldn't read her. I couldn't tell what was going on in her mind. She'd completely closed herself off, and I didn't know if it was to spare Will or me from heartbreak, or if it was because she hated public displays like this...I didn't know, and because of this, I was terrified, because I had no idea what her answer was going to be. Finally, JJ spoke up.

"Will..." she started. "I...I don't know what to say."

"Just say yes, JJ."

"Um...can we do this somewhere else?" she asked.

Will's smile faltered. "Is there something wrong?"

"No, I just don't want to do this in front of everyone."

"What? You can't say yes in front of everyone?" he laughed. Most of the people around us probably didn't even notice the slight anger behind the question. I noticed; so did JJ.

"Will, let's just go to my office and talk."

He shook his head and stood up. He leaned in close to JJ, but I could still hear him. "Baby, we've been over this a hundred times. You want this."

He always did this. He'd wouldn't find out what JJ really wanted...he would just tell her what she wanted like she was a child. He didn't really care about her.

"Will, please."

"No, JJ. We need to think about settling down. We've been over this a hundred times. I can't wait around for you forever."

I was shaking with anger. Every time I thought that Will LaMontagne couldn't get any worse, he'd find a way. I wanted to grab him and drag him away from my Jennifer. The problem was, she wasn't my Jennifer. She was going to be his JJ until she got the courage to walk away or I got the courage to intervene.

JJ just stared at Will for a while. I could tell she just wanted to get away from everyone. Sure, she could stand in front of a bunch of reporters and field their aggressive questions without missing a beat, but it was different when the group staring at you was full of people you had to deal with on a daily basis. She was hating this just as much as I was if not more.

"I can't say yes," she finally said to him. "I can't marry you."

Will stepped closer to JJ. "I think you were right about us needing to go to your office and talk." Will stormed off towards JJ's office. JJ didn't follow at first; she just looked at me as if asking for help. I looked away. This was her mess to clean up, not mine. I wasn't going to allow myself to be drawn into this mess anymore than I already had. Finally, I heard JJ sigh and follow Will into her office.

There was silence in the bullpen as everyone took in what had just happened...some with more understanding than others.

"What the hell just happened?" Rossi asked, sounding more interested than I would've expected.

"Yeah," Reid said. "Why didn't she say yes? I thought she was happy."

"I don't think that's any of our business," Hotch cut in. "The two of them obviously have some things they need to work through, so we should let them do just that. Besides, we all have work to do." Hotch walked back to his office. Just before he closed the door, he looked back at the rest of us. "Let them have their privacy."

The rest of us looked back and forth between each other before Garcia spoke up."

"Screw that," she said. "I wanna know what they're saying."

"Baby Girl, I don't think that's such a good idea," Morgan said, trying to stop Garcia.

"I don't care. She's my best friend, and I wanna know what they're saying." Garcia walked up to JJ's office and put her ear up against the door. I was tempted to do the same, but I knew it would look strange coming from me.

Garcia stood there for a few minutes, but sighed. "I can't hear anything. Damn these thick doors!"

"I think that's probably for the best," Rossi said. "JJ will tell us what's going on when she's-"

Rossi was cut off by yelling coming from JJ's office.

"What the hell do you mean there's someone else?!" It was Will. Garcia pushed her ear back to the door, and by this time, everyone else had gathered outside of JJ's office, trying to hear what was going on.

"Keep your voice down. Everyone is going to hear you," I heard JJ say through the door.

"I don't care! I moved my whole life here to be with you, and you're telling me there's someone else?!"

"I didn't ask you to move here, Will. That was your idea."

"It still happened!!" Will was furious, and I desperately wanted to bust into JJ's office and save her, but I knew she'd just be angry. "Who is it?"

"What?" JJ asked.

"Oh, don't what me, Jennifer." That name sounded so wrong coming out of his mouth. "Who is the other guy?"

There was a pause. Rossi and Reid were staring at the door, but Garcia and Morgan were staring at me.

"I...I don't want to tell you. I don't think it's your business."

"You don't think it's my business?! Are you serious?! It's completely my business! Some guy comes along and is trying to steal you away from me, and you have the nerve to tell me it's none of my business! Fine, if you won't tell me, I'll find someone who will!"

We heard movement inside the office, so we all ran away from the door, scattering and trying to act like we hadn't been eavesdropping.

"You!" I heard Will yell from behind me. I was terrified that he'd figured it out, but when I looked at him, he was pointing at Garcia.

"Me?" she asked. "What about me? I didn't do anything!"

"You know who it is, don't you?" he asked.

"Who who is?" she asked, trying to sound innocent. She wasn't the best liar, but if push came to shove, she could usually hold out...usually.

"Don't play with me, girl!" he exclaimed. "You know who's trying to take JJ from me, now who is it?"

I heard Garcia gulp. Damn it, if I hadn't told her anything that morning, she really wouldn't know who he was talking about.

Garcia shook her head. "She hasn't told me anything, Will. The only man I know about in her life is you." I admired how Garcia could so beautifully find a way around the truth without lying.

"You're lying!" he yelled, prompting Morgan and I to step between the two of them.

"Okay, buddy," Morgan said. "Why don't you go home and cool off for a while?"

"Stay out of my business!" Will yelled.

"Will, you can either walk out of this building or we can physically remove you," I said, happy that the detective wouldn't be here for much longer.

He looked at me and scoffed. "You must be eating this up," he said. He was right, I was, but I wasn't going to admit it. "You've always been in the way. I bet you're the one that introduced her to this new guy." He took a step closer to me.

"Get out of my face, LaMontagne," I said.

"Or what, Prentiss. Are you gonna hit me?"

"I could do that," I replied.

Will shoved me, and before I had a chance to beat him to the ground (and trust me, I would have), Morgan pushed Will back.

"That's it, you're done! Get the hell out of here before I throw your scrawny ass out myself!"

He stared at Morgan, then at me, then finally at JJ.

"This isn't over," he said as he finally left the room.

Again, we all just stood there in shock. No one really knew how to break the tension.

"I'm going out to lunch," JJ said, walking past all of us. I knew I shouldn't follow her; she needed time to cool off and process everything that had just happened, but I didn't want her to walk outside by herself just in case Will was waiting for her. I chased after her, and saw her get into the elevator.

"JJ, hold the doors!" I yelled, but I could tell she really didn't want me coming along with her, so I jogged a few steps and stopped the doors myself.

JJ rolled her eyes."You couldn't give me an hour to myself?" she asked.

"Apparently not," I replied. "Look, I'll leave you alone once this elevator stops, but I just want to make sure you're okay."

"I'm fine, Emily. Just peachy."

The was a small pause before I spoke up again.

"Why did you tell him there was someone else?" I asked.

"Because there is."

I looked at her confused. "Last night you told me that you wouldn't leave Will."

She shook her head. "I don't even know if I'm leaving Will."

"Are you serious?" I couldn't believe her. "You're really going to keep up with this charade after you told him you loved someone else?"

"I don't know, Emily! I wasn't expecting him to propose! It freaked me out! I had to tell him something!"

"Why didn't you tell him it was me?" I asked.

"I really didn't want the two people I'm sleeping with to kill each other in my place of work, thank you very much."

"Okay, fine, but now it's out in the open that you have feelings for someone else. Just break it off."

"God, this is why I wanted to have lunch by myself! I'd like to make a decision without being told by you and Will what I should do!"

The next thing I knew, the elevator came to a halt and went black.

"What the fuck just happened?" JJ asked as the emergency back-up lights came on.

"I think the power cut out or something," I replied.

"Great," she said, rubbing her temples and closing her eyes. "Fucking great."


	5. The Elevator

A/N: Well, I've been on a long hiatus, haven't I? College has been kicking my ass as of late, so I've been focusing my time on that, but I just had my last final, and I'm about to go on spring break, so I'm hoping I can come up with good ideas while I have some down time. Please R&R as always.

* * *

JJ and I stood in the elevator for a second before both of our phones went off.

"Prentiss," I answered.

"Hey, where are you right now?" I recognized Morgan's voice on the other side of the phone.

"I'm stuck in the elevator. What's going on?"

"Power outage. There are electrical people in the building trying to figure out what's going on, but they said it might take a while."

"So what am I supposed to do in the meantime?" I asked him frustrated.

"I guess you'll just have to sit tight. Are you alone?"

"No, I'm not alone." I sighted. "JJ's in here with me."

There was a silence on the other side of the phone.

"Are you serious?" I heard him finally say. "That's got to be super awkward."

"Morgan, say another word, and I'll kill you once I get out of here."

Morgan laughed. "Okay, I'm gonna let you go. I'll tell someone you guys are in there."

"Okay, call me with any updates," I said as I hung up the phone. JJ was still on hers. Usually, I wouldn't eavesdrop, but since we were so close, I didn't really have any other options besides plugging my ears.

"Look, I'm stuck in an elevator, and I'm really not in the mood to talk about this right now." Of course, it was Will. "No, I'm not alone. Emily's in here with me."

Will yelled so loud JJ had to hold the phone away from her ear. I snickered, and she shot me a 'Don't you dare laugh at me' look, so I shut up.

"No," she continued, "I didn't plan on her following me onto the elevator." Pause. "She isn't trying to break us up, Will. She just wanted to make sure everything was okay." Pause. "No, she didn't set me up with anybody! You know, this is why I turned you down, you always have to make a scene out of everything!" Pause. "Yes, there is someone else, but there's more to it than that. We just don't-" Pause. "Well, if you'd let me finish what I was saying, maybe you'd have some answers!" Pause. "Wow, name calling. Real mature, William. I'm hanging up now." With that, JJ snapped her phone shut and turned it off.

"Do you really think that's a good idea?" I asked.

"If anyone really needs to get a hold of me, they can call you," she replied.

"What if it's someone that doesn't have my number?"

"Then it can wait."

"Okay," I said, realizing that I should probably stop asking questions. We dropped into silence. Morgan was right; this was going to be awkward.

"So..." I finally said, not being able to take the silence anymore. "Was that Will?"

JJ glared at me. "I think you know it was."

"Sorry, I just didn't know what else to say."

"How about we don't say anything to each other. Okay?"

I looked at the floor, wondering what to do. There was no way I would be able to just stand there in silence for however long we were going to be in here.

"Will really hates me," I finally said.

"Well, can you really blame him? You were sleeping with his girlfriend."

The use of the past tense didn't go unnoticed by me. "True, but he doesn't know that."

"He knows that you hate him."

"I only hate him because he hates me."

JJ rolled her eyes. "We both know that there's a lot more to it than that."

I sighed. "What do you want me to say, JJ? Do you want me to tell you that I hate Will because he gets to have you? Do you want me to break down and cry and tell you I love you, because I've done all that already, and I'm sick of it."

Before JJ had a chance to say anything in reply, my phone went off, and I answered it without looking at the caller ID.

"Prentiss," I said.

"Give the phone to JJ," I heard the voice on the other end demand. I glared at JJ.

"Did you happen to give LaMontagne my number?" I asked.

"Is that him?" JJ asked, looking annoyed. If I wasn't so royally pissed off, I might say it was cute.

"Yes it's him! How the hell did he get my number?!" JJ didn't answer, so I put the phone to my ear. "Look, JJ doesn't want to talk to you right now, so just let it go!"

"Don't tell me what to do! JJ and I are in the middle of something and you have no right to butt in!"

"Yeah, but you called MY cell, so I have the right to say whatever the hell I want to." I really wanted to hang up, but I knew he'd just call back, and I couldn't turn my phone off, because we needed at least one phone in case of emergency.

God, could my life get any worse?

"Emily, just give the phone to JJ," he said. I hated it when he called me Emily. He made it sound so...wrong somehow. Sort of the same effect the name Jennifer had coming out of his lips.

"I already told you, she really doesn't want to talk to you. Now, if you don't mind, I'm going to hang up and save my battery for more pressing issues." With that, I hung up and just hoped that he wouldn't call back.

JJ looked at me gratefully. "Thank you."

"I didn't do that for you," I said indignantly. That was a lie. I did everything I did for her, but she already knew that. "I really didn't feel like hearing the two of you make up over the phone."

"Ugh, you know, you're like a child sometimes!" she yelled. "I expected Will to react badly, but you? You're supposed to be the level headed one!"

"I'm sorry, but I used up all of my level-headedness last night when I didn't slit my wrists!"

JJ looked shocked. "Did you...did you really almost do that?"

I looked at the ground. I hated losing my cool. Things I didn't want people to know tended to come pouring out of my mouth. It didn't happen often...unless I was around JJ.

"It's not...I didn't almost..." I was backpedaling. The truth was that I probably would have done something drastic if Morgan hasn't been there to comfort me. Exactly what that something drastic was, I wasn't sure, but I knew it wouldn't have been good.

"I'm so sorry, Emily," JJ finally said. "I...I'm just panicking. I mean, you scare me. Being with you is taking more risks than I ever have. Leaving my hometown nearly killed my parents. What are they going to do if they find out about us?"

"For fuck's sake, Jennifer, can you stop thinking about every other person in the world, and finally think about yourself?"

"I can't. I've already messed up too much by thinking about myself. I can't do it anymore."

"Fine," I said. "Than think about me. You once said you cared about me more than anyone else. Was that true?" She nodded. "Okay, then take into consideration how much this is hurting me. Think about how much I'm losing if you walk away from this, because it's a hell of a lot, and I don't know if I'll ever recover."

JJ just rolled her eyes and laughed. "Come on, Emily, look at you. You're sexy and smart, you have a fantastic job, you're high class and sophisticated. You can do a lot better than the wide-eyed girl from the country."

I started to say something back, but I saw tears start to form in JJ's eyes, so I softened up a little.

"JJ, is that what this is about?" I asked.

"No...yes...it's part of it, I guess." She looked away and sighed. "I don't deserve you, Em. You're so much better than I am in every way. I mean, this just proves it more. You're willing to give up everything for what we have, and I'm just running away because I'm scared. I'm scared of what everyone will think, I'm scared of losing my job, and I'm scared..." she trailed off.

"You're scared...what?" She couldn't stop now. I was finally finding out the truth.

She shook her head. "Nothing. It's stupid anyway."

"No, Jennifer," I said. "Finish what you were saying."

She took a deep breath. "I'm scared that one day, you'll wake up and realize that I'm not as special as you've built me up in your head to be. You'll realize that there are so many women out there who are just better than me for you, and you'll leave me, and I'll have no one left." JJ was crying now. "I told you a year ago; Will is safe. He won't stray, and he won't leave me for something better."

I shook my head and stepped closer to her. "Do you really think that little of me."

Her head snapped up, and our eyes met. God, even when they were tinted red from crying, they took my breath away. "I think the world of you, Emily. I always have."

"Then why would you think that I would give up the best part of my life? I'm not finding anything better than you. Ever. All that stuff you said about me is way more true about you. You're so sexy you have people nearly getting into fist fights for you." She smiled a little bit and sat on the floor of the elevator. I joined her and continued. "You have a fantastic job that you'd have to be smart to do. Hell, I know I couldn't do it." More smiling, so I went on. "As for sophistication, you have to stand in front of people every day while they try to rip you to shreds, and you do it with a grace that I couldn't have in my best dreams."

"You dream about being graceful?" she asked, laughing a little bit. She was trying to stop the compliments. Her least favorite subject in the world was herself.

"JJ, you're the most incredible person I've ever met. I don't understand how you can't see that." I put my hand on her face, and I felt her lean into it.

"I'm just scared, Emily. I thought...I thought if I broke things off, it would be better for everyone. Will would have a wife, my parents would have a son-in-law, and you would be free to be with who you were meant to be with."

I shook my head. "This isn't making anything easier for anybody. Maybe your parents, but not for you, not for me, and not for Will. He deserves to be loved, too."

"I know...I really tried to love him, you know."

"I know," I said. "But you can't force your heart to feel something that it doesn't."

She smiled and placed a soft kiss on my lips. It was possibly the best feeling I'd ever had in my life. I'd been so afraid that I'd never feel her in my arms again, but here we were. She pulled back, and I groaned a little in protest, and she laughed at me.

"I can't believe I almost gave this up," she said, before leaning in to kiss me again. This kiss was a lot more aggressive than the first one had been. I didn't mind a bit. It wasn't long before she was leaning back to lay on the floor of the elevator, pulling me along with her. I didn't fight it; I wanted it as much as she did. Hell, I needed it. I needed to know that this was real, that it wasn't some dream that I was spinning in my head.

I started unbuttoning her shirt before I even fully realized what I was doing. I came close to just ripping the damn thing off, but I knew that we'd eventually get off this damn thing and have to go back to work, so I went as fast as I could. While I was working on her shirt, she'd managed to attach her mouth to my neck, and she was sucking hard. My hands started to shake.

"You know..." I said. "You aren't...making this...any easier, Jennifer."

"God, I love it when you call me that," she said, throwing her head back as I pushed my leg between hers. I finally finished with her shirt and started biting at her neck.

"No marks, Em!" she said. It would've slowed me down, but the thickness that her voice had acquired just set me even more on fire.

"No, I just can't leave marks in visible places," I said, and she laughed.

"You know, we don't have an abundance of time in here," she got out. I knew what that meant. I was pretty sure the dumbest man on earth could figure out what that meant. I had to admit that I wasn't very happy with being rushed, but I was so thrilled to feel JJ under me again that I didn't really care so much. It only took me a second to unzip her pants and slip a hand into them over her underwear. I could feel how wet she was, how ready she was for this. I tried to hold back the tears forming in my eyes, but I couldn't. I hoped she wouldn't notice, but of course, she did.

"What's...what's wrong?" she asked rather flustered.

"Nothing, it's just...I was so afraid I'd never be able to do this again."

She smiled. "I was, too." She leaned up and kissed me, and I slipped my hand into her underwear. I heard her take in a breath, and I smiled, just feeling her.

Just before I slipped two fingers inside of her, I heard my phone start to ring.

"For the love of God, don't answer that," JJ said.

I thought about it for a minute, before pulling my hand out of her underwear. She screamed and hit the wall of the elevator.

"It might be important!" I yelled over her moans of frustration.

"I swear, if that's Will, I might just climb out of this elevator, find him and kill him!"

I liked the sound of that. Luckily for him, it was Derek.

"What, Morgan?" I asked angrily.

"Whoa, calm down, girl. I was just calling to tell you that the elevators about to turn back on. Apparently, one of the circuit breakers in this building was way too old, so they had to patch it. They're sending everyone home so they can try to fix it up by tomorrow."

"Fine. Whatever. Thanks." I said hanging up the phone. I turned to JJ who looked like she was about ready to jump me and said, "You better put your shirt back on. The elevator's gonna be up and running soon."

"Are you fucking kidding me?!" I hadn't really realized how wound up I'd gotten her, but I had to admit, I sort of loved seeing her this way.

"On the plus side, we all get to go home," she said.

"Great. Dandy. I get to go home to Will and deal with that whole thing." JJ buttoned up her shirt and fixed her hair. "Do I look okay?"

"Yeah. Fine," I said as I wiped away a little smudged lipstick. "How exactly are you going to deal with...that whole thing?"

"I...I don't know yet. I guess I'll just play it by ear."

With that, the elevators started up again. Before the doors opened, I gave JJ a quick peck on the lips and told her I loved her. The doors opened before she had a chance to say it back, but she looked at me, and I could see it in her eyes.

By the time we got downstairs, the team was already there waiting for us. Garcia and Morgan hugged us both.

"You seriously have no idea how worried we were about you two," Garcia said. "We thought that stupid thing might kill you both."

"Or you'd kill each other," Morgan said, receiving a slap on the arm from Garcia. I loved them.

"Anyway," Garcia said, taking control of the conversation back. "Kevin, Reid, Morgan, and I are all going out for drinks. We were wondering if one of you wanted to come."

"What, we're not both invited?" JJ asked, trying to sound serious, but failing miserably. Still, Garcia was so nervous, she bought it.

"That's not what I meant. I just meant...you know...with everything that happened today...with you two...you know."

"We didn't think you'd both want to come," Morgan finally said. "Since you're both our friends, we figured we'd at least help one of you out, and we'd deal with the other one later."

"Wow, you may be pretty, but you seriously need some help with your tact," Garcia said.

JJ just laughed. "I think I need to deal with the Will situation, so I'm out."

They both looked at me, and I turned to JJ. "You don't mind if I go, do you?" I asked.

"No, it's fine."

"Just call me if you need me, okay?" She nodded and said her goodbyes. Morgan and Garcia looked at me with eyebrows raised after she finally left. "What?"

"What?" Garcia asked. "Before you got on that elevator, the two of you looked like you were ready to kill each other. Now you're asking for her permission to go out with friends?"

I just shrugged my shoulders and rolled my eyes. "We worked some stuff out, that's all."

"So," Morgan said. "I assume it's safe to say that the love birds are flying again?"

"Shut the fuck up, Derek," I said, but I couldn't get the stupid grin off of my face as I walked out the door.


	6. Far From Over

I tried to enjoy my time out with my friends, but all I could do was worry about JJ. I wanted to believe that everything was going to go smoothly, but there were so many things that could go wrong. What if Will freaked out and wouldn't let her leave? What if he tried to hurt her? What if he tried to hurt both of us? What if...I didn't even want to think my last what if was possible.

What if JJ didn't really leave him?

JJ had promised me in the past that she would leave him. The first time had been right after our first time together. She'd told me she loved me...told me that she couldn't stay with Will. I'd believed her. The next day, she'd told me that she wasn't gay, and that the night before was a mistake. I had never felt so heartbroken...so betrayed by anyone in my life. Since then, she'd promised to leave Will so many times I'd lost count. I learned to just ignore her.. I knew it wasn't true, no matter how much we both wanted it to be.

The way she'd said it in the elevator, though, was different than all of the times before...at least, I was desperately hoping it was. JJ leaving me was more painful than either of us had anticipated, and I was sure JJ was sick of living a double life. I know I was. We still couldn't be open with everyone, but we could at least be together without feeling dirty.

I left the bar after a few hours of trying to pay attention. Morgan and Garcia understood, and just wished me luck and told me not to do anything stupid. I got in my car, and started driving towards JJ's house, not really sure what I was going to do when I got there. I just needed to know that she was alright and she'd be with me when the night was over.

I got to the house that she shared with Will, and I parked on the street. After a few minutes, I felt a little bit like an unsub waiting for a victim, so I drove away. I just drove, hoping that JJ would call me soon. I felt like I was going crazy. I was never the type to stalk outside of someone's house, and I was never the type to be the other woman, but JJ seemed to bring out the best and worst qualities in me.

My phone rang, and I snatched it off of my dash board and flipped it open. I didn't have to look at the caller ID. I knew it was her.

"Hey. You okay?" I asked.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Just pick me up at my house, okay?" I could tell she'd been crying, and I could hear Will going on in the background. I couldn't tell what he was saying, but I'm sure it wasn't anything good.

"He didn't do anything to you, did he?" I needed to know if I was going to have to kill him when I got to the house.

"No, I just...I want this to be done."

"Who are you talking to?" I heard Will yell. "Is that the other man? Let me talk to him!"

"It's just Emily!" I heard her yell back at him. "Look, I'm gonna hang up. Just hurry, okay?" With that, she was gone. I couldn't help being extremely confused. What exactly had she told him if he still thought there was another man?

It didn't take me long to get to the house. When I got there, JJ walked out of the house, and Will wasn't far behind. I got out of the car, ready for a fight.

"JJ, don't you dare walk away from me!" Will yelled, trailing behind JJ. JJ ignored him and started loading her things into my car. Will kept walking toward her, so I stepped in between. "Move. This has nothing to do with you."

He really had no idea.

"Just back off, okay? She's leaving you. Get over it."

Will stepped closer to me. "I suppose she told you who she's running off to."

Right before I put him in his place, JJ grabbed my arm and got my attention. I looked her in the eyes, and my heart broke. This was clearly taking its tole on her, and the last thing she needed was for Will and I to cause a scene. I turned back to Will.

"I don't know what's going on. I'm just here to pick her up."

When he knew that he wasn't going to get anything out of me, he looked past me to JJ.

"You know, you're being so selfish right now! I moved my entire life out here to be with you! I lost my job to be here with you! I'm everything you said you wanted in a man and you're throwing it all away!" he yelled at her.

"I know," she said very simply.

"And your parents aren't gonna be happy about this, either! This is going to kill them! They still think that the next time they see you you'll have a ring on your finger! Now they won't have anything!" At the mention of her parents, I saw another tear escape JJ's eye.

"I know," she repeated. "I've thought about all that, Will. I just can't pretend anymore."

"Oh, don't give me that speech again, JJ. You don't know what you want. You're just running away from me because you're scared."

"No, Will. I ran to you because I was scared. There's nothing scary about being with you besides living without the person I care about the most."

"What, this other guy?" Will asked incredulously.

"Yes," JJ looked at me and smiled. "This is the only time I've felt like I was going after something that I wanted." JJ walked around to the passenger's side of my car. Before she got in, she looked over at Will and said barely loud enough to hear, "Besides, every once and a while, I have to stop thinking about every other person in the world and start thinking about myself." I couldn't have been more proud of her if I had tried.

Will looked furious. "You don't even know what you're talking about! Whatever your boy toy told you isn't true! This isn't what's best for you!"

"Back away from the car, LaMontagne," I yelled out the window. He took a step back, and I sped out of the driveway.

"Did you get all of your stuff?" I asked. JJ just shook her head. "Do you want me to get Morgan to pick it up for you?" JJ shook her head again. I wanted to push and ask her what had happened with Will, but I could still see the tear tracks down her face, and the tears still waiting to spill out of her eyes, so I stayed quiet for the rest of the car ride home. When we got to my apartment, JJ spoke up.

"I didn't tell Will about us...exactly," she said.

"I figured that much out," I replied.

"I just..." I saw another tear run down her cheek. "I don't want you to think I'm ashamed of you. I didn't know how to tell him. I mean, I was already breaking up with him for someone else...how could I tell him it was for a woman? How could I tell him the other person was you. He hates you."

I couldn't keep the smile off of my face. "I know he does."

She shook her head and went on. "I didn't want him to hurt you." Before I had a chance to interrupt her, she held her hand up to silence me. "I know you can take care of yourself, but I didn't even want him to try, okay?" She looked at her hands sitting in her lap. "Are you mad at me?"

I shook my head and hugged her. "I'm not mad. I get it. I mean, he'll find out eventually, and at least you left him. I'm just glad this is over."

JJ pulled away from me and we walked into my house. She'd insisted on sleeping in my bed with me that night. Not that I cared. I held her all night and felt more content than I had in a long time, but I couldn't stop a nagging thought that kept going through my mind.

_This is far from over._

_

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_

A/N: I thought about making this the end of the story, but I figured that would be cruel and unusual to leave it on a cliffie like that without resolving everything. I figure I've got more in me...if you guys want it.


	7. The Other Man

A/N: Okay, this is a short little filler chapter, because I'm really into writing two other stories over in the Glee section, but I am committed to this story, so I promise that when I actually get to the next meaty part in the story, the chapters will be longer and more substantial. Please be patient, and continue to R&R.

* * *

I woke up the next morning earlier than I usually did, probably because I felt JJ trying to silently get out of bed.

"Where are you off to?" I asked. I tried to keep the slight tinge of fear out of my voice, but JJ caught it. She might as well have been a profiler.

"I have to get to work. I get there before the rest of you, remember?"

I relaxed. "Sorry, JJ."

"Don't be," she said. "You don't have any reason to trust me, Em." She got out of the bed, but I grabbed her wrist before she could walk away.

"You actually left him this time," I said. I pulled her down and kissed her cheek. "I just have to get used to you not leaving my bed for his."

She sighed. "I'm never going to do that to you again."

I started getting out of bed. "I guess I'll get up, too. You'll need a ride."

"Shit, I hadn't thought about that," she said. "I left my car at Will's. I just didn't think I'd be able to drive."

"Do you want me to drive you over so you can pick it up?" I asked.

"I left the keys, too. I don't think he'd be willing to let me in the house right now. He needs time to cool off."

"He doesn't need time, JJ. It's your car."

She looked at me. "He may have handled all of this really badly, but I'm the one that cheated and left him. No matter how unhappy I was with everything, he didn't deserve that. He deserves as much time as he needs to deal with this. I'll give him his space." I sighed. She was right. He may have been a bumbling idiot, but we were the ones in the wrong. "Now, if you don't mind, I'm gonna jump in the shower."

"You know," I said, "I think we'd save a bunch of time if I took my shower with you."

She laughed. "If I know you at all, and I think I do, that'll take a lot longer than us taking separate showers. I'd like to be into work some time before noon."

"Come on, JJ. I can behave," I said, shooting her a smile.

"No, you actually can't, so I'll be taking that shower now. Alone." She went into the bathroom. I had half a mind to just go in there anyway, but I figured it was best if I didn't. This relationship was already as backwards as they got; we probably needed to take a few steps back before we could move forward. Besides, she was right. It would take a lot longer if I went in there with her.

It didn't take long for the two of us to be ready for work. We decided that going in together wouldn't be too suspicious; we were just going to tell everyone that JJ broke up with Will, and she needed a place to stay if they asked. We figured everyone besides the people who already knew the truth would buy it.

"You know, they're all going to figure it out eventually," I said to JJ on the car ride to the office. "How are we going to deal with that?"

She sighed. "I don't know. I figured we'd cross that bridge when we got to it." The car was silent for a moment before I spoke up again.

"What are we, JJ? I mean, I know you left Will, but-"

"Emily," she said, cutting me off. "I just left my long-term boyfriend after he proposed to me. I'm feeling sort of raw, so could this line of questioning maybe wait a little while? I need time to process everything."

I nodded, completely understanding. Sure, my life was changing, too, but JJ's changes were a lot more drastic than mine. The life that she thought she was building had just come crashing down. I figured I should leave her alone for awhile.

"I'm sorry, JJ," I said.

"Don't apologize, and don't start avoiding me or anything," she said. "I don't need space, I just need a little bit of time to think about where my life is going."

"Sure," I said as we pulled into the bureau. Before we got out of the car, I gave her a peck on the cheek, and she smiled.

"I think I could get used to that," she said.

I smiled. "Well, don't, because this is the last time I plan on being in the office this early."

"You know what I meant," she said, getting out of the car. My smile got even bigger.

It was weird being in the office this early without a case. I wasn't usually late or anything, but by the time I came in, the office was almost full with people. No one else was there, and the building was eerily quiet. I hadn't realized how comforting the sounds of everyone going about their business had been to me until it wasn't there. Hotch came in not too much later, though, and paused when he saw me at my desk.

"Is everything okay, Prentiss?" he asked.

"Yeah, JJ just needed a ride."

He looked in the direction of JJ's office. "Is everything okay with JJ?"

"I don't know if it's my place to tell you about Jennifer's personal life, sir."

His eyebrows raised slightly. "I understand," he said, walking away. I didn't understand why he was acting so weird. Then it occurred to me that I'd just called JJ by her first name, something that really no one did. I sighed. I needed to make sure that I wasn't so obvious in front of one of the best profilers in the FBI.

I worked on paperwork as the office started to fill up. Rossi just nodded at me as he walked in, and Reid waved with a smile on his face. Garcia walked in and went straight to JJ's office, probably to ask her what had happened the night before. They were best friends after all. Morgan came in soon after, and came straight to me.

"Okay, so what happened? I assume it went well since you didn't call me last night crying your eyes out."

"Hello to you, too, Derek," I said. "Hope your morning's going well."

"Come on," he said. "I've been worried all night. She left him, right?"

I nodded. "Yeah, they're done. She just needs to get all of her stuff, but she's giving him some time to deal with everything."

"And you two are?"

I sighed. "I don't know yet. She needs time, too. I'm not going to push her for answers."

"But you want to," he said. I nodded, and he smiled at me. "Don't worry about it. I'm sure that when the dust has settled, she'll throw herself into your arms. There's just a lot to think about right now."

"I know," I said. "I just want to stop having to wonder if she's going to walk out on me. I've been on edge for so long."

"She'll make the right decision, Emily," he said. Before I could say anything back, Penelope came walking out of JJ's office, looking a little panicked.

"What's going on?" I asked. "Is everything okay?"

"JJ's on the phone with her parents," she said. "I guess Will called them this morning and told them everything. They're in the middle of telling her off for giving up such a strong, stable man." I shot her a look, and she threw her hands into the air. "Their words, not mine. She had them on speaker at first."

"Is she okay?" Morgan asked.

"Yeah, she seemed fine, just annoyed," she said, looking at me. "Are you okay? You're going through a lot right now, too."

"I'm fine," I said. "Should I go in there? Make sure she's okay?"

"No, I think she wants to be alone. She's sort of worked up right now," she said. "She said she'd talk to you after she was off the phone."

We all went back to doing our jobs, but I couldn't really concentrate. Two hours had gone by without JJ leaving her office. I'd contemplated going up and checking on JJ, but I knew that her parents (especially her mother) could really get under her skin, and that I'd probably just get chewed out if I interrupted their conversation. Another hour went by, and I knew that I wasn't going to get any work done. I couldn't focus on anything but JJ and what her parents could be saying to her. I really needed to get my emotions in check; I couldn't let this get in the way of my work. Lives were on the line.

Finally, JJ stepped out of her office, locked eyes with me, and motioned for me to come to her before disappearing inside again. I got up and walked into her office.

"What was that about?" I asked, closing the door behind me.

"That was my parents. Both of them."

"I know, Penelope told me." I paused. "You look upset."

"Am I ever happy after a call from my mother?" she asked.

"No, but you seem even more upset than usual."

I she took a deep breath. "My parents are coming into town. They want to try to talk me back into Will's arms." She looked like she had more to say.

"And?" I said, pushing her to finish.

"And...they want to meet the other man."


	8. Anxiety

A/N: Yay for a quick update! The next chapter should be longer, because we'll be meeting JJ's parents, and Will will be involved as well. Hope you enjoy, and please, R&R.

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"Please tell me that I just heard you wrong," I said. She shook her head. "Okay...so what're we going to do?"

"I don't know," she said. "I can't tell them that you're the other man."

"Okay, I'm starting to resent constantly being called a man," I said. JJ shot me a death glare. "Sorry, just trying to release some of the tension."

"This isn't funny, Emily. What am I supposed to do? They said they'd be here tomorrow."

"That soon?" I asked.

She nodded. "That's my parents. They take everything to the extreme. I'm surprised they even let me join the FBI."

I laughed a little bit, before covering it with a cough. JJ really wasn't in the joking mood, and I really didn't want her to blow up at me.

"Well, I don't know what to tell you," I said. "We're going to have to tell everyone the truth eventually."

"I know, but I didn't think it would have to be this soon."

"JJ, we've been together for over a year. How much more time do you need?" I realized that what I'd just said was a little harsh, so I tried to explain. "I just mean, I don't think you're going to have as much time as you think you need. You need to make yourself ready now."

"What am I supposed to tell my parents, Emily? 'Oh, yeah, I never really loved Will and I've been making love with Emily. You know, Emily from work. Oh, and we're living together, now.'" She was pacing in front of me. "They'd disown me, and as much as I say I hate them, they are my family."

"I know," I said. If there was anything I understood, it was clinging onto family that really didn't understand you. "Look, you could just try telling them that you just weren't in love with Will, but you told him there was someone else so he'd let you go."

She shook her head. "That won't work. My mom can always tell when I'm lying."

"Well then what's to stop her from figuring everything out on her own?" I asked.

"There's no way that my mom will think I'm with another woman. Even if she suspects it, she'll shove it to the back of her mind, because that just isn't acceptable in the Jareau family." She finally sat down, putting her head in her hands. "I don't know what to do. God, why can't we just get a case?" She sighed again. "No, I'll take my parents over dead bodies...but just barely."

I laughed. "Well, then I'm pretty sure that makes you a better person than me."

She laughed a little bit. "I can't believe I let myself get into this. I should've just broken things off with Will in the first place."

"Yeah, that's probably true, but you can't dwell on what you should have done; you just have to focus on what you have to do." I grabbed her hand. "And just know, you're not alone in this, okay? I'll be here for you, okay?"

"Yeah...thank you," she said. "I just...I have to figure out how I'm going to tell everyone about us. My parents, Will, Hotch, Strauss...I don't even want to know what she's going to do if she ever finds out. I'll probably be sent away."

"Maybe you'll get a promotion," I said.

"I never knew that you fell back on badly timed humor when put in a difficult situation," she said.

"It only happens when it has to do with relationships-" I got cut off by JJ's cell phone ringing. JJ looked at the caller ID and groaned.

"Your parents?" I asked.

"Will," she answered, and I groaned, too. She flipped it open. "Jareau."

I could hear him yelling on the other end. "_I know you know it's me, JJ! We need to talk!"_

"There's nothing else to talk about. I'm sorry I hurt you, but you need to accept the fact that we're over, okay?"

"_No! If you won't talk to me now, I'll come down to your office and make you listen to reason!"_

"What?" JJ looked panicked. "No, Will, please don't do that." There was no response. "Will? Will?" JJ snapped her phone shut. "Damn it!"

"He's coming here?" I asked. JJ kept trying to call him back, but he wasn't answering.

"He's going to get me fired. He's going to get me fired and thrown out of the FBI."

"I'm sure it won't be that bad," I said.

"He's already forced me into so many unprofessional situations just this week, Emily." She sighed. "I like having my personal life and my professional life separate. I know you're the same way."

"Yeah, well, my two worlds seem to be mixing a lot more as of late," I said. "I think I'll go out there and warn Derek about Will. He'll probably be able to keep him out of here."

"Just make sure Morgan doesn't kill him, okay?" I laughed and nodded. "And make sure you don't kill him, either."

"Okay, I can't promise that," I said. "I'll try, though." I walked out of her office and to Derek's desk.

"Hey, is everything okay?" he asked.

"Yeah...well, no." Morgan looked at me concerned. "It's nothing serious. I'll tell you the details later, but for now, I'm just here to warn you that Will might show up."

"Here?" he asked. "Is he really that stupid?"

"Look, JJ just doesn't want anything to get out of hand. I figure if he shows up, we'll just set up a barricade and keep him away from JJ."

"Okay," he said. "In the meantime, I've gotta try to get some of this paperwork done before we get called away on a case." I nodded in agreement. I actually had a lot to finish up, too, and I was sort of happy to have work as a distraction from all the drama that was going on in my personal life.

Then, right before lunch, Will showed up. Morgan and I immediately walked up to him and stopped him from walking into JJ's office.

"Will," I said, "I think the two of you need time apart right now."

"No," he said. "Look, I overreacted yesterday when JJ talked to me. I talked to her parents about the situation, and they helped me calm down. I just need to talk some sense into her."

"I think she's made up her mind about this relationship," I said. "Just leave it alone."

Will took a deep breath. "Agent Prentiss, while I appreciate that you're taking care of my fiance while she figures things out, this really doesn't concern you. This is between JJ and me."

"Okay, first of all, JJ isn't engaged to you. Second of all, she told you she was in love with someone else."

"She's just scared of commitment," he said.

"Just give her some space, Will," Morgan chimed in next to me. "At the very least, she needs time to think about everything."

Will stood there for a moment, and I hoped that he was going to leave, because I didn't have anymore patience for him. Finally, he said something.

"Just tell JJ to call me after work, alright?" I nodded, and he turned around and left. I sighed in relief. The rest of the day went by without incident, and JJ and I went home together.

"Will wants you to call him," I said.

"I'm not going to. It'll just turn into another fight, and I'm too tired." She looked out the window of the car. "I don't know what I'm going to do about my parents. They were adamant about seeing who I claimed to be in love with."

"I don't know what to do, either," I said, pulling up to my apartment building. "Hopefully we'll come up with something before tomorrow."

"Tomorrow," she repeated. "Oh God, this time tomorrow, my mother is going to be here, prying into every aspect of my life, trying to find out every little detail. I hate my life."

"It's not that bad," I said, and I instantly regretted letting those words leave my mouth.

"It's not that bad? Are you serious? It's exactly that bad! In fact, it's probably worse!" We got into my apartment, and JJ went to the kitchen and poured herself a drink, downing it in a few seconds. She went to pour herself another.

"Whoa," I said, taking the bottle away. "Slow down. I don't think that's going to help any."

"God, I feel like I'm in high school again, sneaking around because my parents wouldn't approve of the way I wanted to live."I sat down next to her and put my arm around her, and she leaned into my side. "I hate that I feel like my parents are still controlling my life. I hate that I so often let them do it."

"I think that a lot of people are guilty of that, JJ." I thought of my life with my mother. I'd sort of had the opposite reaction of JJ; my mother wanted me to be one way, so I made sure to be the opposite of what she expected. In doing that, I'd somewhat let my mother shape my actions. There had actually been a few things that I'd wanted to do in my youth that I'd actively avoided because my mother had wanted me to do them. "Relationships with parents are usually complicated."

She sighed. "I'm going to bed. I need sleep."

"Do you want something to eat, first?" I asked.

"No, I just need sleep. The last few days have been more than exhausting.

"Okay," I said. "I'll go get the bed ready while you change." A few minutes later, I was laying in bed as JJ laid down next to me. I put my arms around her.

"Em?" she said.

"Yeah, JJ?"

"I'm sorry I tried to end things. I can't remember if I've told you that, yet."

"It's okay," I said, holding on to her more tightly. "You were scared. You're with me now, and that's all that matters." I kissed the back of her head. Before too long, I heard her breathing even out, telling me she'd fallen asleep. I wasn't as lucky. I couldn't help but think about our situation. Once everyone found out about JJ and me, there was no telling what would happen. I just tried to be thankful that this was the second night in a row I got to hold the woman I loved without her having to run back to Will.


End file.
